Ikeaesque Art Museum Townhome Clearly Staged, Asks $359K

The listing photos manage to evoke the feeling that Ikea showrooms do: if you lived here, your life could be so easy! There would be perfectly sized shelves for all of your belongings! Your back patio would cascade with effortless vines, the bedrooms might be cozy, but you'd know exactly how to arrange them just right, and you'd tie hand towels into elaborate origami-knots every day! If you could just organize your living space this way, and strike the right balance between homey touches and clean lines, everything would be better, and this house will make it better. Those thoughts are how you can tell you're being duped. Duped by professional home stagers.

The front porch gives off an easy, breezy, boho vibe, and the living room is carefully curated to evoke a sense of easy, clutter-free coziness. But don't get too comfortable: the records, dvds, books, and cds are arranged in eerily straight lines. And the plates on the wall are too artful and careful to have been placed there by a mere weekend DIY-er.

Though the exposed kitchen beams and mason jars stacked against the wall are designed to foster a sense of authenticity, don't be fooled: the perfectly stacked white dishes, stainless stee cookware, and just-so vases are the work of a professional home stager or perhaps a professional home stager's child.

But the final proof? The minmalist bedroom with two perfectly placed wall sconces and no other decor. This is a nice house, but if you buy it, it will eventually fill with clutter. And no matter how many precious plates you staple to the wall, your kitchen will never be that clean, and you will never lean an easel against your copier.
House Vitals:
Size: 3 bedrooms, 1.5 baths, 1,400 sq ft.
Amenities include: Leftover built-in shelving for the neat freak in you, a fig tree on your back patio, granite countertops and hardwood floors.
Asking price: $359,000
· 2949 Poplar St [Trulia]