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Sprawling Pawlings Road Estate Asks for a Mere $8,999,999M

When looking at the offering of this estate, it's very difficult not to feign affectation of formality. The home speaks to an owner who loves polo matches, political dinners, and horseback riding. All while wishing to be apart from the rest of the fast-paced, incendiary world. The main home clocks in at 8,900 square feet.

Really, a presidential presence runs through its beams. It was built in the year of our country's birth: 1776. It knows things we read history books for, because this Greek Revival mansion was built by none other than renowned architect John Haviland himself.

Seven bedrooms, nine bathrooms, and far too many friends, family, dignitaries, and formerly-known-as-strangers to house. But the overflow of people who flow through the home to visit could roam the virtual countryside of the property. Nothing short of stunning could describe the sheet vastness of the 15 acres with which the owner can play, relax, and wander. This may counterbalance the low Walkscore of 31; but no need to worry, since the listing could really become it's own little town of one owner cohabiting with a few other inhabitants. It may be tiring to continually feel the need to pontificate to others, since the owner may feel a sense of elevated gravitas after holding the keys to this home.

And the price tag, which rambles on with its nines: $8,999,999 million, is only fitting for a home of this stature. This is the Fatland Estate for a reason: without mincing words, it's huge.

·833 S 3rd Street [Zillow]